White Papers 2
Why it is Necessary to Tame the Ego Mind
Shame and Bipolar Disorder — A Vicious Cycle
The Family Myth and a Note on Personal Myths
The Crisis in Western Medicine
WP10: Why it is Necessary to Tame the Ego Mind
The ego mind is an important and necessary component of the human mind. Briefly, the ego mind identifies with the self or the understanding and conception of the person’s identity. It also has an especially important function of protecting and maintaining a positive and functional identity of the self that allows us to operate in the world of social interaction as well as within our inner personal world. About half of our ego mind is what we brought with us from our pre-mortal life experiences and development and the other half from early mortal experiences, particularly the developmental ages 2 through 7.
Our testing and clinical work points to a presence of the ego mind in both the conscious and unconscious mental processes, though mainly operating in the conscious mind. Our testing suggests that, ideally, a person’s ego mind ought to occupy 31% of the conscious mind and 9% of the unconscious mind.
Unfortunately, these ideal percentages are seldom the case. If a child has experienced fears, abuse and/or rejection during critical developmental years the ego development will tend towards controlling behavior as a survival mechanism. Excessive ego strength generally is a protection against fear and emotional pain and, unfortunately, takes the form of an unconscious “hard heart” against God. It is also a distortion of the true self that God has created and nurtured in the pre-mortal realm.
In order to understand the importance of these ratios of ego mind versus the remaining parts of the human mind, it is necessary to consider that an ideal path through life is one that incorporates guidance from the Spirt of the Lord. For when the ego mind exceeds its ideal levels, to that extent the person’s will is fighting against God. This is a fact that few people consider, but it is the reason that the old adage holds true that, “the best laid plans of mice and men often go astray.”
The ideal life path would follow as closely as possible a walk through the challenges of life hand-in-hand with the Savior. It is important to understand that He is perfectly willing and able to do His part in this. However, as we come here to learn and we, being human, learn by a variety of methods, booth positive and negative, the ideal is just that—an ideal. And the Lord knows perfectly well we will struggle, stumble, and need help.
We also come here to mortality having before made certain promises to God and others, including family members, that will later be factors in how our life plays out. Generally speaking, the more our choices are in alignment with these pre-mortal promises and commitments the better things go for us. We come here with a mission or multiple missions whose fulfillment largely effects our happiness here as well as that of our family, friends, and others in our life path—not to mention our eternal reward.
However, when our ego mind exceeds its ideal portion of our thinking and acting processes, we will inevitably suffer consequences that are less than ideal, maybe way less. When the ego mind is particularly strong in a person, such as in the high 40’s (maximum is 55%).the idea of seeking the will of the Lord or involving Him in personal or even daily decisions is truly a foreign concept. The excessive ego mind says, I know what is best for me. Whereas, the reality is, that no-one knows what is best for them. We may have a lot of information and a lot of ideas or advice and much of it may be good, but only the Lord knows what is best for us. Making all of our own decisions inextricably eventuates in sorrow.
The excessive ego person has also developed a persona with which they are often deeply invested. This persona likely over-compensates to cover weaknesses and fears. Since this person cannot imagine any change in a persona in which they have invested a lifetime (regardless of age) any perceived threat of an alteration is abhorrent. In our work people often bolt when they just sense a painful change might be on approach. This despite the fact that they will never be genuinely happy in their old ego-controlled skin.
It is also unfortunate that the excessive ego actually recoils from the thought of having genuine communication with God—which is where and how this problem can be fixed. There is an unhealthy clinging to personal will—a fear of losing control of one’s life. There is also fear of pain and punishment. This may include a lack of understanding that the pain of a life directed by self-will is far greater than any pain experienced as a result of accountability and a partnership with God.
Repentance and dealing with past mistakes can indeed be painful but is very short-lived in the Lord’s merciful economy. It is faith and trust versus fear. It is arriving at the conclusion that the Lord actually does have our best interests in mind always. This conclusion should be obvious but clearly it is not for many people. The Lord loves us, wants us to be like Him and makes the necessary arrangements if we are willing. It is those who take His gifts and the suffering of Christ’s Atonement as a light thing that makes Him angry.
Our clinical experience with person’s operating under the direction of strong ego has caused us to return to the Taming the Ego Mind Process (TEMP) a number of times in attempts to strengthen it as a tool to assist to free people from the emotional and spiritual straight jacket of excessive ego mind. This includes having to address synaptic patterns in the brain.
Our work is only truly effective when a client softens their heart and puts their hand in the hand of the Lord. When this happens, our services are no longer needed. Our object is for a person to graduate from Processing to a comforting and continuing walk with the Lord. Our object is to release the things which interfere with a person’s agency and then trust him/her to be inspired to place that agency on the altar. This typically requires a readjustment of the ego mind and a new level of trust in the Lord facilitated by effective personal two-way communication with Him.
Letting go of ego requires faith, but “without faith it is impossible to please God.” We understand that it was by faith that the worlds were created, and it is by faith that God’s ultimate creation in us is achieved. This is the objective of the Taming the Ego Mind Process.
For more information on this subject see:
WP11: Shame and Bipolar Disorder -- A Vicious Circle
By virtue of working with someone diagnosed with Bipolar Disorder (BD), (otherwise or formerly known as Manic-Depressive Disorder) we discovered that, though her bipolar behaviors did not manifest in any real degree until the subject was in her 40's, childhood shaming was actually the root cause. Since shame has the lowest frequency of any human emotion or feeling except for hatred and murder it cannot possibly be beneficial for a child still in his or her developmental years. testing revealed that our subject's experiences of parental administered shame began at about 19 months of age and continued until age 8. Guilt, another low frequency emotion was also stimulated in the home. In this case the subject was born and still lives in a German speaking country where shaming was often standard procedure.
Shaming tends to be a vicious circle because it eventuates in behaviors that also attracts shame. The manic phases manifest, for example, in bipolarity, bring not only unwanted or negative attention they also eventuate in a depressive stage in which the subject regrets the manic excesses and punishes his or her self all over again. It is as if the mother was there administering this poison throughout the subject's adult life whether she (the mother) is actually alive or not.
Additionally, such energetic disturbances are passed down through the family lineage both genetically and epigenetically to continue to wreck some degree of havoc in later generations and in other forms of dysfunction and disability.
For more information on this subject see:
WP12: The Family Myth by Mark Sichel, LCSW and Alicia L. Cervini, and a note on Personal Myths
What is the Family Myth and why does it have so much power over our individual growth and our family relations? What happens when the Family Myth, nurtured and prized for so long, meets its match at the hands of inevitable change? The answers to these questions can be shattering.
What is the Family Myth?
The Family Myth is a well-rehearsed notion, wholly false, about the nature of the family unit. The Family Myth dictates that surface appearance is more important than individual happiness: that what "ought" to be true must squelch what IS true. The Family Myth is the presumption that evey family member is compatible, possesses the same goals and loves one another. The Family Myth is a fantasy predicated on a like-it-or-not unified "we" -- a contract that no one seems to remember signing.
Common Family Myths generally are framed as "we" statements. "We all get along wonderfully." "We all have the same goals and like the same people." "We are all loving and accepting people and we believe in democracy and choice." The Family Myth does not usually allow for "I" statements. The Family Myth does not tolerate choice readily.
Why does the Family Myth have so much power over our individual growth and our family relations?
Family Myths are generally fantasies about the love, support, and caring nature of one's family of origin. This is what makes the dissolution of the Family Myth so terribly profound and earth shattering.
It is very easy to get caught up in the fiction of a Family Myth. The families we envision when the Family Myth is born are always happier, cleaner, better people than ourselves. The Family Myth is supposedly an ideal; unfortunately we don't always actually want to be what it is that we think we want to be. The resulting conflict between what we want in theory and what we want in reality is often a destructive one. Furthermore, in most cases, the fashioning of the Family Myth is not a democratic process. Not everyone even gets a say as to what the Family Myth is going to be.
Despite the decidedly undemocratic way in which the Family Myth is initially established, the idea of being shinier, better versions of ourselves or having the unconditional love and support of every family member is a seductive one. Consequently, in families where the Family Myth is actively propagated, we all eventually buy in. The pervasive and persuasive nature of the Family Myth is the reason you don't see blue mohawks in Norman Rockwell paintings.
When a family member makes a choice that is an act of independence -- like a blue mohawk, or a spouse of another race, or an unusual hobby, or a career other than the family business -- the Family Myth is threatened and a rupture between family members necessarily results. The typical response to such a threat, by a family under the sway of the Family Myth, is swift retribution or even a family "divorce," whereby the offending family member is cast out.
What happens when the Family Myth, nurtured and prized for so long, meets its match at the hands of inevitable change?
In some cases people we see who are going through a shattering family "divorce" follow the laws of the Family Myth to a tee, not realizing that the tenets of the Family Myth are not necessarily what will actually make themselves or their family happy. In other cases, individuals in the family make choices or decisions that are blatantly in opposition to the Family Myth, causing deep rifts between family members. Let's look at two case studies:
Alice* had always felt that her family wanted her to marry a man who was strong, stable, a good provider, successful and committed to raising a family. So she did. The Family Myth demanded nothing less. She did not realize, nor did her family consciously realize, that what her parents really wanted was for her to marry a man who would blend in and be unimportant and powerless in relation to themselves. As a result, Alice and her new husband, James could not understand why they were constantly embroiled in bitter family arguments over seemingly inconsequential matters. They could not understand why Alice's parents were constantly provoking them. They did not know how to manage Alice's family from a distance without getting themselves into trouble. No one in the family understood that strictly adhering to the laws of the Family Myth with no room for compromise makes no one happy.
Grace had always been Daddy's girl and Mom's Mommy. After her parents' divorce, Grace accompanied her Dad to social events and was his best pal. Her mom, on the other hand, wallowed in depression and drug abuse for years after the divorce. Grace cleaned the house, cooked, and tried to be her Mom's therapist and best friend. Grace came to therapy to work on developing her career as a singer and actress in musical theater. She also worked out her poor choices of men, and ended up marrying Rod, a successful restauranteur. Not surprisingly, along the way she also became an independent adult, breaking her ties with her dysfunctional parents.
Grace stopped being the caregiver for her mom, and instead gave her the name of a therapist. Grace became less pathologically involved with her Dad. Then, after she announced her marriage to Rod, both her parents stopped speaking to her. Grace was shattered. She had been punished for her emancipation. Grace was not aware that healing herself was against the rules of her family. She was shocked to realize that neither of her parents wanted to have connections and lives of their own, and yet they resented and envied Grace's new life. In this instance, the Family Myth was a rather dingy and broken-down one - not the utopian familial vision that most families subscribe to. However, in the most dysfunctional of families, it is not at all uncommon for the Family Myth to be the picture of dysfunction: "If I'm messed up then you'd better be, too."
Family members pay a high price for going against the grain. Grace had tired of putting her own life on hold and forced her parents to release her. Alice and James excelled and surpassed her parents in their accomplishments and education with their independent thoughts and actions. Powerless in the face of these decisions, family members responded with "divorce," the casting out of the offending family member.
Births, deaths, marriages, ageing, holidays, retirement, career successes, business failures - all the ups and downs of life - all have the potential for challenging the Family Myth and creating shattering scenarios for individuals. Both Grace and Alice were devastated by their family's rejection of them. The loss of their parents' approval shook the very foundation of their lives, leaving them hurt, disoriented and depressed.
Over time, Alice and James were able to repair their family "divorce" by acknowledging the myths of Alice's family and learning to adapt to the family's need to feel that Alice and James were submissive and accepting of them. Of course, in this healing process, Alice's family had to learn to live with the level of distance and difference exhibited by James and Alice.
It took Grace many months to work out her differences with her parents. Room had to be made in the Family Myth for Grace and Rod's marriage. Grace had to convince her parents that her own rejection of an unhealthy lifestyle was not a rejection of them.
It is neither necessary nor a good idea to give up hard won emotional growth in order to remain a member in good standing of your family. Neither should you sublimate all of your wishes and desires in order to please your family. But it is important to examine your own Family Myths. Once you understand them, you will be able to avoid a "divorce" in the family by negotiating safely the rocky paths that could challenge the Family Myth. Or, if a schism has already occurred in your family, it will be possible to see what steps can be taken to begin the healing process.
*The names of all clients have been changed to protect their identities.
Note on Personal Myths: There are also many personal myths that interfere with optimum performance and success in life. To say, for example, that "I am no good at math", most likely means I have never put forth the necessary effort or someone shamed me into thinking so. Or, "since everyone at that school is stuck up." means I don't have to bother to go there or "I don't have to deal with making new friends if I do go there." Or, "since I am confined to a wheelchair I can't really accomplish anything of any value in life". People tend to make or fall into generalizations that serve to protect or prevent them from experiencing life to the fullest. These can be myths that come in a legion of varieties and follow the path of least resistance short-circuiting our ultimate well-being. Neuro-Genix Processing can greatly assist with resolving these impediments to health, well-being and success. For the detailed steps in the PFMP Process see;
WP13: The Crisis in Western Medicine
The current trends and situation of western medicine (as of this writing, 08/11/2020) are unsustainable for a variety of reasons. Obamacare (designed as an interim step to nationalized healthcare) and its vestiges are far from being the only problem. The burgeoning costs of health care are not only out of control, they are sustained by a fossilized approach to health and healthcare that has abandoned the wisdom of the ages, while ironically failing to see the potential benefits of quantum physics applications and other unique approaches to health. At this writing President Trump is finally bringing down the costs of pharmaceutical drugs which have been exorbitant and a burden to the taxpayer and to insurance costs in the US. But this is only part of the problem. A careful examination and analysis of statistics might actually lead one to conclude that western medicine, at least in the US, is killing at least as many lives as it is saving. See footnote 2,
We have become so accustomed to turning over all responsibility for health to the medical profession and they have, for the most part, gladly accepted the responsibility along with its fiscal rewards. The medical community and its constituents have slipped into an unhealthy abrogation of accountability on both of their parts. Just one common example being played out in backyards and school yards across the nation (when their open): little Sarah goes out in 40 degree weather without a jacket. She plays outside for an hour or goes to recess without even long sleeves. That night she starts coughing. The next morning she has a stuffy nose. That day at school is a repeat of the no jacket or sweater foray. Within 2 or 3 days Sarah is at the Doctor’s office getting some antibiotics. This will get rid of the infection but will have also taken some toll on her immune system. Rebounds of such infections are common. There are all kinds of variations on this theme. By the time Sara reaches her teen years her immune systems will have been compromised to some degree or another and she will, as a result of this lack of common sense on the part of the parents, now be more susceptible not only to respiratory issues but also to more serious diseases.
My wife comes from the old world. She, as her mother before her, knows how to prevent common health problems as well as how to deal with them, and essentially without doctors or pharmaceuticals. This does not mean that they would never be consulted or utilized but only when common sense measures may not be sufficient. However, our society has totally lost track of the relationship between cause and effect and there is too much money to be made providing this artificial safety net for which we have become too reliant. We run to the doctor for some instant fix for every complaint and think we need an MRI when we have a headache. But now we are paying for it. And the recent debacle associated with Covid 19 in which we accept the opinions of people in white lab coats as some version of constitutional law is a classic example. It is also unfortunate that doctors with common sense dare not stand up against the ideological complicit narratives driven by fiscal and political elites.
So this is pretty much our own fault. And if we were individually and collectively responsible we could fix it. We have allowed ourselves to take the path of least resistance, which is a good formulae for loss of freedoms (health, political, etc.). But there are other serious problems that are also not so easily addressed. Almost everywhere you look there are new hospital buildings going up, neighborhood clinics popping up everywhere, medical centers, surgical centers, urgent care, specialty facilities, etc., which all have to be outfitted with the most recent equipment and devices. Now, it isn’t there is no need for some of this but certainly not to the extent that we are witnessing. Western medicine has become a self-serving cash cow that must constantly have all the latest equipment and service in order to be competitive and, ironically, has skewed the fiscal benefits from the doctors to the hospital itself and its owners. We live a stone's throw from a giant hospital that is always half empty, even during the recent pandemic. And this is not uncommon. Our investment in western medicine also promotes and is dependent upon the unhealthy western lifestyle. For these and other reasons (including a poor return on their investment) many doctors are leaving the field and retiring early. One result of which, is a crop of less experienced doctors spread too thin (the same goes for nurses) and often with less commitment to the quality of the work.
Furthermore, the constant need to drive income through the hospital and clinic turnstiles as well as satisfy the insatiable appetite of the drug companies has warped the industry’s sense of mission and integrity. The compromises made to enhance the bottom line are all too well known to those who slave in this environment to keep up some semblance of genuine health service. There are still hospitals and doctors who provide excellent and cost-effective service, and these should be among the models for reform. But there are other problems that remain to be addressed, and that includes having to do with the fossilized nature of almost this whole industry. Did I say, "fossilized"? Yes, I know there are fancy technological gadgets everywhere.
Obamacare just poured a certain amount of concrete over a dysfunctional service sector and any reforms that do not address fundamental basics will simply prolong the agony of failing healthcare and genuine reform. For example, besides simplifying patient care this industry deserves a serious lesson in vibrational medicine. They really have a very limited scope of understanding of the human body—one that engenders way too many surgical procedures and pharmaceutical drugs and still lacks a critical comprehension of the causes of disease. They are looking mostly in the wrong places and with the wrong methods. The fixes tend to cause as many problems as they solve—largely confined to treating symptoms and with an outdated Newtonian view of their field. When medical science views the physical body in terms of its actual bedrock constituents, energy and information, chronic disease will begin to make sense to them and the dangers of the current environment (and treatment environment) will come into focus.
Also, medical research, published articles and medical journals have all become an incestuous ring of self-aggrandizement, dogma, political correctness and a sort of priesthood of their own—much like what has been the closed political environment inside the DC Beltway. Should the reader take offense at these assertions, reading the following quotations from people of the highest caliber and extremely pertinent experience may assist.
"It is simply no longer possible to believe much of the clinical research that is published, or to rely on the judgment of trusted physicians or authoritative medical guidelines. I take no pleasure in this conclusion, which I reached slowly and reluctantly over my two decades as an editor of The New England Journal of Medicine.” (Dr. Marcia Angell, NY Review of Books, January 15, 2009, “Drug Companies & Doctors: A Story of Corruption", emphasis ours).
And, “The case against science is straightforward: much of the scientific literature, perhaps half, may simply be untrue. Afflicted by studies with small sample sizes, tiny effects, invalid exploratory analyses, and flagrant conflicts of interest, together with an obsession for pursuing fashionable trends of dubious importance, science has taken a turn towards darkness… The apparent endemicity of bad research behaviour is alarming. In their quest for telling a compelling story, scientists too often sculpt data to fit their preferred theory of the world. Or they retrofit hypotheses to fit their data. Journal editors deserve their fair share of criticism too. We aid and abet the worst behaviours. Our acquiescence to the impact factor fuels an unhealthy competition to win a place in a select few journals. Our love of ‘significance’ pollutes the literature with many a statistical fairy-tale…Journals are not the only miscreants. Universities are in a perpetual struggle for money and talent…” (Dr. Richard Horton, editor-in-chief, The Lancet, in The Lancet, 11 April, 2015, Vol 385, “Offline: What is Medicine’s 5 sigma?" emphasis ours)
The emergence of quantum physics should also call into question much of medical studies due to such aspects as the observer effect and quantum entanglement associated with experimenter bias and studies aimed at achieving statistical significance associated with financial rewards. This is the reason many initial studies with positive significance often cannot be replicated by neutral parties.
Also on July 26, 2000 Dr. Barbara Starfield, associated at the time with the Johns Hopkins School of Public Health, revealed her findings on healthcare in America. The Starfield study titled, “Is US health really the best in the world?”, published in the Journal of the American Medical Association (JAMA), came to the conclusion that US health care was nowhere near the best in the world and that, among other concerns, every year in the US correctly prescribed FDA approved medical drugs kill 106,000 people. Consequently, every decade, these drugs unnecessarily kill more than a million people. According to a year 2000 WHO study of the world’s top 50 health care systems the US was ranked 37th in the world at that time (Columbia was 22nd). Not only that but our costs were among or at the very highest of the entire group.
Western medicine still deserves much of the honor that it gets but it is not a carte blanche solution to our nation’s health issues and is due for a major re-examination of its role, its incentives, its responsibility, its approaches and its use of technology. Our frequently heard public pronouncements that we have the best health care in the world is also, as noted by Dr. Starfield above, ludicrous. Some rankings have us as low as only the 37th best in the world. Add to this the fact that post pandemic research articles and studies are off the chart when it comes to bad science. For example, there is essentially nothing in the way of peer reviewed studies on such things as wearing masks and on such things as hydroxychloroquine (HCQ) conducted prior to Covid 19 that supports the recent and post pandemic draconian measures and ideological science foisted upon the American public by powerful vested interests. It is scary to consider the state of affairs when ideology governs science and science research or, worse yet, when the grid goes down and all of our artifices with it.